Thursday, March 30, 2017
Red Sox Announce 'Improvements' To 105-Year Old Park
new "enhancements" are on display this year in America's Most Cramped Ballpark. (EDITOR's NOTE: For the record, we love Fenway—and have attended games there since 1956, but Red Sox fans deserve a new, state-of-the-art replicate of Fenway). Ready for the vast improvements? Here are a few: expansion of the home and visitors dugouts; a new bar in right-field; new (undoubtedly outrageously expensive) day-of-game suites; more virtual reality junk; and new food (for example, the really stupid Lobster Poutine Stak). Oh, sorry, we forgot to mention the "refurbishment" (read: replacement) of the Pesky Pole. Wow, all of that should really excite fans! Oh, and their lapdog at Boston City Hall (Mayor Marty Walsh) is "previewing" all these lavish new improvements today! Thanks, Mister May-Yah!