Monday, September 28, 2015

Evil Empire Can't Figure Out Rotation Against Red Sox

The Pinstriped Posers face four pretty important games this week against the Red Sox. After all, they're just 4.5 games ahead in the Wild Card race and only four games out of the division lead. And yet, they have no clue who will start games 2-4 against The Carmine Hose. Tonight the wildly inconsistent Ivan Nova gets the nod against Eduardo Rodriguez—who has been very effective in his Bronx Embalmer starts. Boston will start Rick Porcello Tuesday, Wade Miley Wednesday and Rich "Cy" Hill on Thursday. Empire Manager Joe Girardi's problem is the unclear health status of Masahiro Tanaka—who they need to get well before their elimination game in the Wild Card. So, it's a Starting Pitching Wheel Of Misfortune for The Evil Ones—as it should be.