Monday, July 21, 2014

Fenway Only Eighth Most Veggie-Friendly Park

What a blow to the politically-correct NOG (New Ownership Group)! PETA (that wonderful organization that puts mutilated animals on the outside of its fund-raising mailers) has designated Fenway Park as only the eighth most "veggie-friendly" ballpark in baseball. Oh, the humanity! John Henry must be red-faced that a place like PNC Park in Pittsburgh (home of the decidedly non-vegetarian Primanti Sandwich) finished five spots ahead of America's Most Cramped Ballpark. We're sure that the NOG has convened a high-level emergency team to correct this horrible injustice. Look for many more veggie and vegan treats at the ballpark in the near future. You know, like free-ranging clam chowder, Non-GMO hummus and 'gently-popped' popcorn.