It figures that I've got tickets to tomorrow night's tilt against Prince Fielder and the Rangers. Not tonight, no siree, Bob! Tonight, all fans get a very cool David Ortiz Bobblehead—complete with sunglasses and fingers pointing skyward. There is no justice in this world. John Lackey takes the hill for The Carmine Hose against Texas, who will send out a guy not named Yu Darvish (Tanner Scheppers).