The 1997 season was bad enough for the Boston Red Sox (78-84, finishing 4th in AL East), but it was made far worse by the introduction that year of Wally The Green Monster. Wally—who turns 17 years old this April 13th—is still infecting America's Most Cramped Ballpark with inane antics and an out-of-shape body. Now, our erstwhile GM Theo Epstein has foisted an even more egregious mascot on the benighted fans of the Chicago Cubs. Feast your eyes on Clark, the new face of the North Side. He even has a worried look in his eyes—no doubt anticipating the derision he will receive from hard-core fans at Wrigley. Yikes!