Frankly, we always kind of liked Brian Roberts. Until now. ESPN.com is reporting that Roberts has signed a one-year, $2 million dollar incentive-laden deal with The Evil Ones. The 36-year old second-baseman has spent his whole career with the Baltimore Orioles, and has missed huge chunks of the last four seasons due to various nagging injuries. He's a gamer, however, and—if healthy—will help fill the huge hole left by the departure of Robinson Cano. The Bronx Embalmers have also brought in Kelly Johnson as insurance at second and third base (in case A-Fraud gets banned).