Sure, you can pour $285 million into a century-old ballpark, but that doesn't mean you can make it work. Last night, two Arizona-based reporters were trapped in a Fenway Park elevator for twenty minutes before they escaped—John McClane-like—through the top door of the stalled car. Steve Gilbert of mlb.com and Todd Walsh of Fox Sports Arizona were the victims of America's Most Inescapable Ballpark. All they were trying to do was return to the press box after their D'Backs lost to Boston, 5-2. Ghosts in the machine?