As tempting as it is to contemplate a lifetime ban for Alex Rodriguez, that eventuality is not really in the best interest of the Boston Red Sox. Why? Because a lifetime ban would likely allow The Bronx Embalmers to recoup the roughly $60 million that would be left on The Fraudulent One's contract. Armed with an extra $60 million or so, the Steinbrenner Spawn could effectively re-build The Evil Ones. If A-Fraud is suspended for just this year and next (balance of 2013 and all of 2014), he'd be eligible to play again in 2015—and guess who he's still under contract to? Even better, if Rodriguez appeals the suspension, he could be in the Yankee lineup by the end of this week. Ah, schadenfreude!